Volume 1.26: Wouldn't Mind A Lie Or Two

Type: Series

Genre: Urban Fantasy

Rating: M

Characters:  Cadence, Luca, Rachel, Sonja
Word Count: 1495

Glossary: 

Warning: nasty photoshopped rain and lightning

What would you do if I kissed you?

What would you do I held your hand and laid you down

Would you recognize it's a need I've been fighting for so long

Would you recognize it's a hunger only you can fill?

I'd Like-Freshly Ground

Cadence wanted to cry as she packed her bags and prepared to leave. She’d thought some time apart from Sonja would put things into perspective but it hadn’t. In fact being away from home had left her feeling more confused and vulnerable.

She’d hoped her mom would initiate the first contact and beg her to come home, but so far Sonja had listened to her parting shot and stayed away, giving her all the space and time in the world to work through her anger.

Another person who’d stayed away was Luca. Cadence had seen him around town a few times, but apart from a courteous nod, he’d said nothing to her. She didn’t blame him; after all she did ask him to stay away from her.

“Hey, so this is it?” Rachel cried when she walked into the room and found her gazing out of the window, she’d just come back from her morning jog with Rudi.

“Yeah, vacation is over. I can’t keep hiding here. I was hoping mom would break first, but it’s been two weeks, that woman is as stubborn as mule. I have to work things out with her,” Cadence replied. She closed her backpack with such force Rachel thought the zipper would break off.

“I can come with you if you want, you know, to smooth things over?” Rachel offered as she took off her training shoes and stripped down to her underwear.

Cadence shook her head, she’d be okay, she didn’t need a handler…

Almost ten minutes later Cadence was greeted by silence when she got home; Sonja volunteered at the Homeless Shelter on Thursdays.

“So much for the warm welcome,” she muttered under her breath as she made her way to her room.

Her disappointment quickly vanished when she saw the gift bag on her desk. She remembered it from the last time she was there, but in her haste to leave she’d forgotten all about it.

Cadence looked through the bag now and pulled out a music box, a mummy ballerina sprung to life when she pried it open. The music was from Swan Lake, and it instantly transported her back to her own performance two years earlier.

The moment the music died down, the mummy ballerina stopped dancing too, and with shaky hands Cadence reached for the origami inside the box.

She could hear his voice in her head as she read the message. “Never stop.”

His words left a sharp ache in her heart and she wished she could go back and change their outcome at the beach. She wished she could change a lot of things too, starting with who they are.

“Oh Luca! Why can’t you leave me alone?” She threw her face in her hands and cried for all the things they’d never have.

She didn’t know how long she lay on her bed, crying her eyes out, but when she heard the front door open, alerting her of Sonja’s return, she quickly brushed away her tears and blew her nose before she went to greet her.

Sonja was in the kitchen, packing away the groceries when she came in.

“Hi mom,” Cadence cried from the doorway. Sonja turned from the fridge, a look of surprise and relief danced in her eyes.

“Cade, you’re home?” She asked. She sounded unsure, but a little hopeful too.

“Yes. I am,” Cadence nodded as she helped her with the rest of the groceries.

For a while they worked in silence as they prepared a late lunch of macaroni and cheese.

“Cade, I’m really sorry about everything. I shouldn’t have misled you like that and the past two weeks I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. There’s so much I’ve kept from you, but I think you deserve to know the whole truth. Everything.” Sonja opened the conversation when they sat down to eat.

Without saying more she left her place at the table and rushed to her room. Moments later she came back with a battered photo album Cadence had seen amongst Sonja’s things from the past, things she was never allowed to play with, look through or ask about.

Sonja pushed the album towards her; it made a soft grating sound on the surface.

For the longest of times Cadence didn’t say anything, her stomach was in knots and her hands shook vigorously as she ate her food. She really didn’t know how much more truth she could take and she told Sonja this.

“I know. And I’m sorry. But you’ve always wanted to know about your father. Here he is. Everything. I was wrong to keep him away from you. But I thought I was protecting you,” Sonja murmured as she brought her chair closer.

They spent a large part of their afternoon looking through the photos and talking about Warrick. Cadence was devastated when she finally learned the truth about the circumstances surrounding her father’s death, her guilt settled in quicker than Sonja had anticipated.

“I sealed him in there? I let him die? You let me let him die? How could you?” She screamed at Sonja as she pushed away from the table.

“It wasn’t like that. They said they didn’t know he was in there. I’m so sorry,” Sonja sobbed and apologized over and over. But the look in Cadence’s eyes told her it was futile; their relationship was damaged beyond repair.

“You keep building me up, only to tear me down again and again. I can’t do this anymore,” Cadence whispered before she ran out of the door…

She kept right on running, she had to keep moving, if she stayed still long enough she was convinced her guilt would catch up with her and tear her apart.

Soon though her legs buckled under the pressure and she fell on the rotting wood on the footbridge and cried as she rocked herself back and forth, unfazed by the rain and cold. She’d never felt so much rage in her life, and she was horrified at herself and what’d done to her own father. A small part of her knew it wasn’t her fault, she was just a baby then and she’d had no say in the matter. But another part, the one being weighed down by guilt refused to absolve her, refused to give her the quiet she so desperately wanted then.

Her ass on the wet floor grew numb and she forced herself to get up. When she turned around she was stunned to see Luca there.

It was the first time in two weeks they’d come face to face. Just looking at him hurt her, he was everything she wanted but could never have.

She tried to move past him, but he pulled her to him. The gentle way he held her and brushed her hair away from her face made her cry even harder.

“I sealed him in there. Along with your brother and everyone else! I understand now why you hate me so much, why you don’t want to be with me, because I hate myself just as much. I let my own father die,” she wept on his chest.

“I could never hate you, Cadence. And I told you before, whenever you’re ready to know the truth you know where to find me,” Luca murmured consolingly.

The moment she heard the word “truth” Cadence bolted again. But Luca caught up with her swiftly and held her in place.

“Why did you run off like that?” He asked as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear; his touch was brief, fleeting, unreal, and so cold, and Cadence found herself holding her breath, craving more of him, remembering their time at the beach when he’d almost made love to her.

“I can’t take any more truths today. Maybe tomorrow.  Today I wouldn’t mind a lie or two,” she explained.

Before the words were even out, Luca had already pulled in her a heated embrace and he was kissing her.

It felt very much like all their other kisses. Magical. And just for a little while, she got carried away in his lie. She’d take it any day; it didn’t hurt like Sonja’s truth…

“Let’s get you home,” he murmured when they pulled apart. Cadence wanted to protest and reclaim his lips. She didn’t want the lie to be over so soon. She wanted to hang on to it, and its falsehood, it had no expectations, no promises. Just the here and the now. Nothing more. But Luca had already turned away and started down the bridge. She reluctantly followed him, struggling to keep up with his long strides.

“I know you said you don’t want to hear any more truths today. But that kiss wasn’t a lie, Cadence. It was the truth. I think you can handle a little more if you open yourself up for it.”

“No, Luca. No more truths,” she shook her head and ran inside the house…